We are only here briefly, and in this moment I want to allow myself joy.



For Certain

Today I experienced something that I thought I would never experience. And beyond the denial and doubt, there was certainty. Certainty that we weren't going to be "together forever".



I'm being rightfully punished. I don't know for how long but I deserve it. What's making me stay? Love.


The Five Pillars

I'm currently doing my summer holiday routine where i watch reruns of Will and Grace and there's this old episode of Will and Grace where Will takes the Five Pillars of Happiness test. And since i'm finally out of one of my denial phases, i thought i'd take the test, with as much truth as i can.

Work - I had a really great bar job earlier this year; great team, great management, great system. I was actually really good at being that cool bartender and i received a lot of compliments about my customer service abilities from the team. I was 3 months in when i was about to become supervisor and everything was great. Just like everything in my life though, it came crashing down as fast as it came up. I don't really blame anyone because really, what is that going to do. I blame myself, i blame myself for getting too cocky and too attached to a casual job that is a casual job. I'm at a new bar now, it's not that bad but i'm definitely learning my lesson and not getting too attached - to break it down, i'm just going to do my thang, get paid, go home.

Health - I'm presently in one of my post festival virus feeling shitness. No check for health for me. I'm still best friends with Mary Jane though, but maybe i should stop being friends with her. Starting to see that maybe i've become this extremely cynical person this year because of her. Or maybe it's this post festival depression shit that i'm just putting the blame on the one thing that was with me all year.

Family - I am living in constant culpability that i will never give back to both my ma and pa everything that they have given me. And this guilt is eating me up each and every day that i became more of a failure.

Friendship - Don't really have much friends. Came to the realisation that most of my closest friends stem from my partner. Therefore,,,,

Love - Confusing.



It took me this long since it's release to actually post a review about this album, Not because i was unsure about it but because i honestly couldn't put into words how much i love this album. If i were to describe this album, it would just be - euphoric.

He will be coming to Australia for Stereosonic and i can already feel that it will be the happiest day of my life.


"The same shit keeps on repeating and repeating that i'm so fucking scarred from it. You've made me so fucking negative. No one gets upset about most of the things you get upset with." - A

21st September 2014, 12.32am



"Sometimes i forget to exist" - A
"Me too.." - P

20th April 2014, 5:31am